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Categorized | Layla, Opinion

Layla the Blog Dog’s Take on the Republican Field

Editor’s Note: Put your paws together for Layla the BlogDog. We watched the debate together last night and she decided to write her next post on her take on the Republican field.

Last night’s debate was really cool. I learned a lot more about the candidates. After a big meal of some ground up looking stuff for dinner that really smelled good, I settled in on the sofa to assess the Republican field.

Here’s my take:

On Ron Paul, I agree with Greg Gutfeld. Paul is like a chocolate candy with a fruit center. You either like the chocolate or the fruit, but not both. While his non-interventionist talk sounds good and appeals to some people, realistically, we have to consider preventative defense. Not intervening in the long term will likely be more costly in terms of lives and wars.

Michele Bachmann has a career in acting after she retires. If they ever make a film of the life and times of Tammy Fay Baker, she’s got the part! Every time she spoke last night I couldn’t really listen to what she said thinking about the perfect image of her makeup clad face she must leave on her pillow each night and hoping I never sleep in that hotel room after her. Good conservative, but not presidential material.

Rick Santorum. Just not doing it for me. I like a lot of what he says, there is just something irritating about him. Like an eyelash in the eye. Not really dangerous, just uncomfortable and you want it to go away.

Jon Huntsman. Irritating in a creepy sort of way. The uncle whose lap your Mom tells you not to sit on. The fact that he speaks Chinese scares me more than impresses me. There’s just something about an old white guy speaking Chinese that’s just wrong. It is like watching Chubaka sing Sinatra.

Rick Perry. I had high hopes for him at first. Until I actually heard him speak. I am fluent in Texan, so it’s not a language thing. He just reminds me of somebody that has put a poo poo cushion in your chair and is waiting for you to sit on it. And he’s stoned. And you just know he’s gonna bust out laughing. I also have Mr. Natural type flashback moments of George W. when he talks. But there are 3 thing I really like about him. His boots, his drawl and I forget the third thing. Maybe there was just two.

Mitt Romney. I really want to like him. But I just can’t. Just a bit too John Kerry for me. Rich white guy with big hair. The guy that goes out of his way to try to make you like him, but he ends up making you feel really uncomfortable with a hint vomit. It’s like he is still looking for his first friend and really hopes to find one soon. I hope it’s not me!

Newt Gingrich. He’s the best fed of the group. The anti-anorexic candidate. To his credit, he is the only candidate that has the ability to look shocked and even perplexed when attacked. The rest of the candidates seem to have that goofy (zany if you will) smile that makes them look like they just walked out of their dentist’s office before the nitrous-oxide had completely worn off. Google should be very afraid of him. Newt makes them obsolete. And shallow.

So, basically, a really great field. And I will be happy and proud to support any one of them against Obama. They are all far, far better than what we now have in the White House.

And that’s kind of sad, really.

Except maybe the one that looks like Pee Wee Herman’s Grand Dad. He’s a bit off.

About Layla BlogDog

Conservative in all things but affection. 100 pounds of Yellow Lab – Boxer mix. Raised on Fox and Football. A truly analytical canine with a nose for truth.

2 Responses to “Layla the Blog Dog’s Take on the Republican Field”

  1. Sara for America says:

    "Rick Perry. I had high hopes for him at first. Until I actually heard him speak. I am fluent in Texan, so it’s not a language thing. He just reminds me of somebody that has put a poo poo cushion in your chair and is waiting for you to sit on it. And he’s stoned. And you just know he’s gonna bust out laughing. I also have Mr. Natural type flashback moments of George W. when he talks. But there are 3 thing I really like about him. His boots, his drawl and I forget the third thing. Maybe there was just two."

    Priceless.

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    Tom White Says:

    Nothing is more conservative than a republican wanting to get their majority back. And nothing is more liberal than a republican WITH a majority.

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